My stomach hurts. What could it be?
- bowel obstruction!
- mega colon!
- cancer (duh)
- internal bleeding!
- diverticulitis!
- gas!
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Time Out for Paranoia!
Weather Report
Oh my. The sky is REALLY ANGRY right now. How have I angered you, oh rumbly, flashy one? You know, weather's a real jerk sometimes.
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Things That Impress Me
1. Back flips. I have the utmost respect for people that do back flips. They truly are the superior humanoids.
2. Cats with dancing skills. Because I don't have any.
3. People who write mad wicked songs. If I could, I would too. EG Paul Macartney, John Lennon, Adele, James Morrison, Freddy Mercury, Missy Higgins, John Mayer, Alex Lloyd & even Van Morrison. Hate his voice, love his lyrics.
4. Confidence. If you can be confident without being arrogant or snooty, that's righteous.
5. Dudes with style. If you can be yourself and be happy with that, congratulations. You are awesome.
6. Extreme sports. It's so easy to hurt yourself or fail at, so props to those who can do it well.
7. People who are changing the world with music, like Bob Geldoff, Bono and Coldplay. Even Amy Winehouse is doing her bit for drug awareness :)
8. Novelists. They are soo committed and dedicated. I'll stick to short stories.
9. People who can chug Maccas milkshakes without spewing. Haven't met any yet, but I'm still lookin'
10. Musicians. I'd love to be able to play the piano or guitar...or my harmonica. Percussion is pretty dull.
2. Cats with dancing skills. Because I don't have any.
3. People who write mad wicked songs. If I could, I would too. EG Paul Macartney, John Lennon, Adele, James Morrison, Freddy Mercury, Missy Higgins, John Mayer, Alex Lloyd & even Van Morrison. Hate his voice, love his lyrics.
4. Confidence. If you can be confident without being arrogant or snooty, that's righteous.
5. Dudes with style. If you can be yourself and be happy with that, congratulations. You are awesome.
6. Extreme sports. It's so easy to hurt yourself or fail at, so props to those who can do it well.
7. People who are changing the world with music, like Bob Geldoff, Bono and Coldplay. Even Amy Winehouse is doing her bit for drug awareness :)
8. Novelists. They are soo committed and dedicated. I'll stick to short stories.
9. People who can chug Maccas milkshakes without spewing. Haven't met any yet, but I'm still lookin'
10. Musicians. I'd love to be able to play the piano or guitar...or my harmonica. Percussion is pretty dull.
Ode to the Toothbrush
Got nothing to do? Write poems about inanimate objects! I did.
Oh toothbrush,
you are so pretty and new,
so great to use.
Oh toothbrush,
how you keep these teeth of mine
so clean and nice.
Oh toothbrush,
I could not live without you
or I would get...
gingivitis.
Oh toothbrush,
you are so pretty and new,
so great to use.
Oh toothbrush,
how you keep these teeth of mine
so clean and nice.
Oh toothbrush,
I could not live without you
or I would get...
gingivitis.
Subject: Tired
Woke up really early this morning. So. Tired. Seriously considering propping eyelids open with toothpicks. Should probably just have another Diet Coke instead. I have also found the cure to my all-day headache with judicious application of caffeine and chocolate chips.
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